Musings from Miami

I can't believe it's nearing the end of September already. As usual, it's been awhile since I've written in this journal. I really did intend to write in it more often, if for no other reason than for the writing practice (which I definitely need), but I think I've dreaded writing lately since all my writing for the last several years has been academic writing.

I've had a lot of changes in my life lately. As I have managed to write before, I met a girl. We recently had our six month anniversary and have since then moved in together. It was more of a practical decision than anything, since my lease was up and there was no way she could continue to make house payments on her own now that she's gone back to school and started a Masters program in English. (Plus we like being together.) But I'm not used to sharing my space, and not counting sharing a room with my brother when I was 13, I've only once had a roommate previously (when Markov and I shared an apartment). This is different, though. We've already had a couple of blowup fights, and we get on each other's nerves more, but I take it as a good sign that we still like each other most of the time.

It's also been a big adjustment for Ciara. She's never had to share an apartment with anyone else, and she's never been around any other cats before, so moving in with a human she previously seemed to hate as well as with three other cats has been a huge adjustment for her. She's doing surprisingly well, though. My predictions for what would happen were (1) she would try to dominate/bully the other cats or (2) she would have a heart attack from the trauma of moving, living with a strange human, and being around three cats. Instead, she suddenly started being nice to Nicole (whom she used to hiss at, hide from, and swat at), and after spending a few days hissing at and hiding from (but not swatting at) the other cats, she calmed down, they seemed to work out their own hierarchy, and Ciara adjusted. As I write this, Ciara is resting on the back of my chair, another cat (Mittens) is resting by my feet, a third cat (Abigail) is resting on the armrest of a love seat across the room, and I hear the tag of the other cat (Fenway) rattling against the food bowl.

Nicole and I have quite a menagerie now. Mittens is her oldest cat, about 8 years old (the same age as Ciara) and our only male cat. An orange tabby cat, he's the alpha male of the bunch; the other cats defer to him. Apparently he doesn't usually like men -- he still only tolerates Nicole's dad -- but the first day I came over he crawled into my lap and fell asleep, so he seems to like me. Fenway is the next oldest of Nicole's cats. (Yes, her name is Fenway, as Nicole is an avid Red Sox fan.) A big fuzzy gray cat, she is clearly the fattest and none too bright. Nicole says she didn't know how to be a cat until Mittens took her under his wing and showed her how. For example, she used to pee on the floor next to the litter box because she'd go halfway in, feel litter under her front paws, and think it was okay to go, and she still drinks out of the water bowl by dipping her paw in and drinking out of her paw (I've never seen a cat do that before). Abigail is the youngest and spunkiest of Nicole's cats. Dark gray on her top half and white on her bottom half, she has a stubby 3-inch tail and was born blind in one eye. When Nicole first adopted her, she tried to dominate the other cats, but Mittens and Fenway shunned her. She's a shy cat (it took her awhile to warm up to me), but she's also probably the cutest, taking off running for no apparent reason and begging for attention with her tiny high-pitched mouse-squeak of a meow. Now we've added Ciara to this bunch, my 8 year old but still very energetic and slender spunky black cat ("the bitch kitty," as Nicole calls her). Ciara spent a lot of time hiding from the other cats her first two weeks in the new house, but she seems to have adjusted very well and appears to have established her place as the alpha female; Abigail and Fenway defer to her, while she defers to Mittens. (I happen to find cat social dynamics fascinating -- and very cute.)

This is also my first time living in an actual house since moving out of my parents'. Well, technically it's a duplex, but it's close enough. It's a large, 2 bedroom, 2 bath duplex with an office, dining room, enormous kitchen, attached garage, and patio. We had to get rid of my futon, her couch, and a couple of other things, but it was big enough to accommodate pretty much all of my stuff.

My parents came from Indiana two weeks ago to help me move, so they met Nicole's parents for the first time. They had already gotten to know Nicole pretty well, between me talking about her, Nicole flying to Vegas after my brother's wedding to spend a long weekend with my family, and Nicole and I coming to Indiana last June to visit, and they had heard good things about her parents, but they hit it off really well. The day they met, our dads were even coincidentally wearing the same outfit (black polo shirts with khaki shorts), which was kind of funny. Right away, our parents were warm and genuinely comfortable with each other -- not just making polite conversation and being nice but seeming to actually like each other. That was nice.

The biggest news of late, though, has been my unemployment. I've never been unemployed before, but my job ended at the end of August, and I've been drawing unemployment since then. I was really worried I wouldn't find a job in this economy, especially since I now live in a small town of about 16,000 and have to drive at least 30 minutes to get to a city of any size, plus I really can't afford to be unemployed for more than a few weeks. Fortunately, I just accepted a job at The Watershed, a private residential substance abuse treatment facility in Boynton Beach about 45 minutes away. It's going to be hard work, working long hours with a difficult client population, I'll be driving 90-120 minutes a day (depending on traffic), I have to work holidays, and I won't get any vacation for six months. But I'm happy that I'm employed, and that I'm doing something in my field instead of loading boxes or waiting tables. In name, it's a postdoctoral position, but it's basically a job that I can keep until I defend my dissertation and accrue the 2000 hours of service I need post-defense in order to get licensed as a psychologist in the state of Florida, so it's a pretty good opportunity for me.

I also just got a brand new 2010 Mazda CX-7 (my first new car) after my 1993 Buick Skylark with more than 200,000 miles on it finally bit the dust, so life is pretty good for me right now.

On to finish my dissertation! (More on that soon.)

I really need to post in this thing more often.

Let's see. What have I been up to? (Am I really beginning a post with a series of questions to myself? I guess it's been awhile since I've written. Either that, or I'm rambling.)

My doctor is an idiot and I don't have diabetes (or hepatitis - apparently some liver test was off a bit). I was supposed to go back for a follow up after a month (and that was about two months ago), but I haven't followed up on that, and since my doctor didn't even bother to schedule an appointment, I'm not going to bother, either.

Work for the JETS Program is still insane. One of my bosses (who some people have taken to calling "Prada Lady" after Merrill Streep's character in "The Devil Wears Prada") has made my work environment a little uncomfortable by occasionally yelling at me (I think she thinks I'm incompetent), but I've managed to avoid meeting with her for several weeks, plus I've been managing to work less than 50 hours per week, so work is going okay. I've also gotten some compliments lately from clients, parents, and probation officers who are happy with my work, so that feels nice. Now I just need to find a job to start once my current position ends at the end of August.

Things with Nicole are still going well. Her parents adore me, my parents love her, and even though we've spent only two days apart during the past three weeks, I'm not getting tired of her in the least bit. Her mom keeps making me food, and her dad offered to loan me his car last week when mine was in the shop -- that's a pretty big deal. Nicole and I visited my family and friends in Indiana earlier this month. My friends all seemed to like her, and she got along famously with them. She met my extended family, and they were all very warm and welcomed her with open arms. Nicole particularly liked my grandma. Everyone seems to like the idea of Nicole and me as a couple, so I take that as a good sign.

The dissertation is still unfinished. I am painfully close to being done but other things keep coming up (like getting my car repaired). I have managed to work on it for at least an hour a day for the past three days, though, so that's progress.

My car is finally fixed. I've had five, no six repairs done within the past week. Last Monday I drove back to Miami from spending the weekend in Stuart with Nicole, and by the time I got to work, the engine was smoking. By Monday evening, I had overheated the car to the point where it shut down in a left turn lane and I could not get it restarted. So I had it towed to the Buick dealership. The dealership parking lot was gated and closed (in spite of an after-hours drop), so I then had it towed to a Pep Boys. They wanted $80 just to do a diagnosis, so I just had them replace a burned out headlight and drove the car (two miles, overheating, in heavy construction traffic) back to the Buick dealership, where they replaced my cooling fans. They wanted over $200 to replace the battery, though, so I took the car back to Pep Boys and had them replace the battery. That was my Tuesday. I had to cancel several clients since I had no car to get to work. Nicole saved me, though; she is on summer break and was nice enough to come down to Miami and take me to and from work (and auto repair shops), so I only missed half a day of work (Even so, I still worked more than 45 hours last week.). Then on Wednesday, the car appeared to run fine until I was leaving a client's home up north (nearly in Broward County), when it wouldn't start. Not even the door locks would work. Apparently my battery terminals were rusted near the starter, so I had to have those cleaned on Thursday. That was an expensive week. Then last weekend Nicole's dad helped me reattach my hood release switch to the hood release cable and fixed my broken center console lid by cutting a spring (for free, thankfully), making that six repairs to my poor old car in as many days. I hope she runs okay for awhile now.

My brother just got back from his honeymoon. I haven't talked to him since he got back, but apparently he had a really good time, except for a day and a half long unplanned layover and a really rough plane ride.

I also had a fascinating discussion with my friend Kelli yesterday about hypothesized microbial causes of mass extinctions in the fossil record. Seriously. Yes, I'm a nerd.

That's all that's up with me, I think.